I didn’t sleep well at all last night. Far too much was going on in my head to let me relax and when I did fall asleep, I woke up with nightmares and had very strange dreams. The weirdest dream I remember had me standing in the checkout line at the local grocery store. The man in front of me turned around and it was Hank Williams Jr. He and I then broke into an a cappella duet singing “Help Me Rhonda” while the other customers around us clapped.
I woke up from that one wondering if my nighttime medications had expired and gone bad or something.
I went out into the living room at about 1AM and read out there until a little after 3AM. I went back to bed but sleep was still elusive. I know I managed to fall asleep at some point but I don’t know for how long – all I know is I felt like crap this morning.
After J left for work I tried to take a nap but ended up staring at the wall or ceiling. I tried napping on the couch and in the comfy chair downstairs but the results were all the same. I put on some records and tried to ignore the noise in my head but I think it was just destined to be a bad day.
I got an email from Dr C saying that she was ill and couldn’t make our appointment today. I think that worked out for the best – I don’t think I would’ve been comfortable driving this afternoon.
I spent some time observing the shrimp. They’re interesting little creatures. Watching them eat is very interesting and almost looks like they fold up the fish flakes while they’re eating them. I could still find two of the little baby shrimp so at least some of them haven’t been eaten by their parents yet.
There’s another big ransomware scare today. It’s shut down some UK hospitals and is spreading rapidly. When I saw that, all I could think of was what I would have been doing if I was still at work. I could feel that familiar tightness in my chest signalling that a panic attack was on the way but I got away from the computer and did some grounding exercises and managed to avert it.
I have no idea what I’m going to do this evening or this weekend. I’m behind on the laundry so I need to do some of that; I also need to put some stuff away. Maybe I’ll finish putting the seat and panels back on the motorcycle so I can move it to a different spot in the garage and do some welding. That would be nice. I’m sitting around a four right now, it would be really nice to bump it up to a six or seven.
Stay safe!