Tough Time Sleeping Again Last Night

Song: “Magic Power” by Triumph

Mood: 7

Nightmares: 0

Well, last night didn’t go as well as I was hoping. It was well after 4AM when I finally fell asleep. The medications that I’m taking in the evening used to leave me struggling to walk up stairs but for the last while they don’t seem to touch whatever’s going on. Fortunately, I was able to sleep in a bit so that made up for some of the lost time.

I spent a lot of time today writing. It didn’t go very well because I’m a little tired and can’t concentrate enough on things to write coherent sentences. It’s like I have two brains – the one that knows exactly what it wants to write (and how to do it eloquently) and a smaller, dumber one that’s actually in charge of running my fingers. That’s okay, though, because not every day can be a perfect day.

J was ill today so she wasn’t able to take me to my Dr W appointment. He’s usually very good about changing dates around but I figure we could probably just leave things until next week. If something comes up or changes drastically I’ll be sure to call and see if he can fit me in, but I don’t expect anything to go wrong.

I went outside for a little while today. Not long but it was pretty nice outside. The wind was pretty wicked, though – I almost lost my hat.

I’m feeling a bit of pressure about the upcoming holidays. Everything is fine, I just don’t want to disappoint anyone. This will likely be the second year in a row that everyone else has to change their schedules around and do a lot of driving because I can’t and I feel bad about that. My sister and her family is flying in to go to my parents’ place and it would be really good if I could see them, too.

I feel like there’s something else that I wanted to jot down here but for the life of me I can’t remember what it was. I hope that my sleep gets back to normal soon. Staring at the wall or ceiling in the dark isn’t fun.

Stay safe.

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