My Sleep

I don’t think it’s possible for me to overstate how important a good sleep is to me. One rough night can have several days’ worth of consequences, and several bad nights in a row can put me right back in the hospital. Here are some of the things that happen when I don’t get enough sleep:

  • I have trouble finding the right words when talking or writing. This is embarrassing and a little frustrating, but overall not a huge deal.
  • I am much more vulnerable to panic attacks, and things that shouldn’t make me panic can send me into a downwards spiral.
  • I can’t fend off depression or anxiety as easily.
  • My thoughts go to dark places a lot more often.
  • My OCD kicks into high gear and I have a lot of trouble even with things that I’ve already conquered, like checking the stove or whether the door’s locked.
  • It is much harder to force myself to do anything.
  • I am much more likely to start hearing voices again.
  • I just want to be alone, curled up in a little ball somewhere in the basement. I don’t want to see or talk to anyone.

Fortunately, between the medication Dr W prescribed, the techniques and information about sleep hygiene that Dr C showed me, and the CPAP machine, I am getting a good sleep much more often than I used to. My only real complaint now is that my nightmares have been making a bit of a comeback lately. Fortunately, they’re still not as bad as they used to be and usually only make for a 30 to 45 minute period before I can get back to sleep.

Here’s what I do during the day to help myself get a good sleep:


  • Get up within the same two-hour window every day
  • Take my morning medication within the same two-hour window every day
  • Have breakfast within the same two-hour window every day
  • Take some time (usually around 45 minutes) to worry about things so they don’t bother me as much over the rest of the day
  • Do my exercises
  • Meditate


  • Make sure I remember to eat a lunch that has at least some protein in it
  • Keep myself busy doing things like chores or hobbies
  • Meditate


  • Make sure I’ve talked to someone during the day
  • Keep myself busy doing things like chores or hobbies
  • Have supper within the same two-hour window every day
  • Brush my teeth and get everything ready for bed before I take my evening medication so I can just go to bed and crash without needing to do any prep later
  • Take my evening medication within the same two-hour window every day
  • Go to bed within the same two-hour window every day
  • Meditate
  • Do breathing exercises until I fall asleep

It seems like a lot of stuff to remember but once I got into a routine, it became very easy to remember everything and find time for it.

One thing I need to work on is what to do if I can’t fall asleep. I should get up, go out to the living room, and read a magazine or something like that, but I keep telling myself that if I stay in bed just five minutes longer, I’ll fall asleep. Of course, I keep saying that until I look at the clock and realize two hours have gone by. I need to force myself to get out of bed and wander off to the living room until I get tired.

Stay safe!

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