Song: “Skipper Dan” by Weird Al Yankovic
Mood: 7
Nightmares: 0
Ghosts: Pack
It was easy to get to sleep last night and I slept pretty well. No nightmares and I only remember waking up maybe three times to worry about things, none of which kept me awake for very long.
I got quite a bit done today. Had a small but interesting chat about religion with my aunt over text, got a lot done on one of my electronics projects, and two packages showed up today.
I’ve been finding that with the right combination of mood, sleep, music, comfort, and interest, I am getting quite a bit better at concentrating on things. There’s a positive reinforcement cycle that happens, where I’m concentrating on something so I’m not worrying about things, which lowers my anxiety and lets me concentrate better for longer. I think part of it is that things are moving in the right direction, but I’m pretty sure that a lot of it is practice.
It doesn’t really matter why, though – I’m just happy that I can work on something for more than five or ten minutes before switching to something else or taking a break. I feel a much better sense of accomplishment when I can see that I’ve done or made progress in something. That improves my mood, which makes it easier to concentrate, which lets me accomplish more things, which improves my mood. Positive reinforcement everywhere!
The stuff that Dr H called about yesterday was on my mind today, too. I’m not so much worried about how it affects things today as I’m tired of all the doctor appointments and probes and scans and tests. It’s also got me a bit worried about what the future is going to be like. I’m in my mid-forties now, and, if I’m being frank about it, the things that normally happen when one ages are going to start happening, but I have the added “bonus” of going into that with things already wrong.
I probably shouldn’t worry about that, though, because Dr H is on top of things and we’ve already fixed some stuff. No reason this won’t be fixed soon, either.
Next week is going to be a little busy – I have appointments on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday. Nothing scheduled for the rest of this week, though, but I may volunteer at the church sometime in the next few days. We’ll see.
Tomorrow I hope to print some stuff up, get some more work done on electronics projects, and start sorting the chaos in the workshop. I’d also like to listen to some records. It’s been a while.
Stay safe.