Today marks a month since my first post to this site. I’ve got to admit, writing about how I’m doing and the things that help me has been feeling good. Of course, there are some days when I don’t feel like doing anything, but I’ve been really enjoying this. I’m grateful that Dr C suggested I try to get back into hobbies that I used to enjoy, and thankful for her, Dr W’s, and J’s support.
I started posting two days after I got home from the hospital. It was quite difficult at first – I didn’t really feel like writing, didn’t know what I wanted to say, and had trouble writing it down. Since then, it’s been getting easier to come up with things to say and write them down.
I’m still feeling pretty well since I was discharged. I’ve had some ups and downs but I think I’m trending steadily upwards. Dr C and I are no longer dealing with the crisis of the week, instead we’re able to work on the same thing for a couple of weeks in a row. Dr W has been reducing my medication and despite having to return to the earlier dose of zopiclone, I am still down a fair amount of medication from where I used to be.
I’ve still got a long way to go, though. I still can’t answer the phone, I still have nightmares and panic attacks, and I can’t handle crowds, sirens, or police, government, or military imagery. I still stay away from news sites and TV channels and I have to be careful with the movies and shows I watch with J. My memory and concentration aren’t very good, and I can only drive comfortably within a limited radius.
But that’s okay. With more work, time, and the support of my family, friends, and professionals, I will continue to get better, even if there is the occasional step backwards.
If you’ve been reading my ramblings, thanks for your time and I hope you found something useful or helpful along the way!
Stay safe!