Doing Well But Pretty Tired

Song: “Faith” by George Michael

Mood: 7.5

Nightmares: 1

Today was another good day. It flew by – I don’t even remember half of the stuff I did. I’m pretty tired now, though, so I guess I was pretty busy.

My Dr P appointment went very well. I’ve got one more appointment with him and then we’ll be taking a three week break over the holidays. I think everything will go well but if not, support from a professional is just a phone call away.

We worked on expanding my comfort zone some more and then spent the rest of the session talking about my intrusive thoughts. His advice to me was to take the ACT path and just accept them as thoughts. Thoughts are just that – thoughts, and they’re not good or bad, they’re just thoughts. Everyone has intrusive thoughts once in a while, too. He used the example of a polar bear – think of the polar bear, from its nose to the different colours in its fur to its claws… then he said he was going to set a 20 second time and in that time I had to not think about a polar bear at all. I couldn’t do it, which was the point he was trying to make. Struggling against intrusive thoughts and trying to force them out of my head is also a good way to make sure they stay around longer than they normally would.

More good news – I didn’t notice any change when I reduced my haloperidol last night. I don’t know if some kind of side-effect will show up over the next few days or so but I’m really quite pleased that on day 1 things were fine. Hopefully this means that I’ll be able to tolerate further reductions over the next short while!

Even more good news – I slept quite well last night. I don’t think it took me more than an hour to fall asleep.

I had a good chat with my parents this evening, it was good to talk to them and be able to tell them that things were still going well. They’re very supportive and want to do everything they can to help me, which I appreciate a tremendous amount. I’m very lucky!

Stay safe.

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