Two Years!

Song: “Ocean Man” by Ween

Mood: 7

Nightmares: 0

Ghosts: Lots

I just noticed that two years ago today I wrote the first post on this blog. I had been out of the hospital for two days after spending five weeks in the psych ward (my second visit). I wanted to share my experiences, let other people know that the views and treatments of mental health have changed for the better over the last while, and hopefully be a net positive voice (however tiny). I have learned so much in these two years, and I genuinely think I’m a better person because of it.

None of this – the blog, the experiences, the knowledge – would have happened without the love and support of so many people. I don’t know what I did to deserve it, but there are so many people who have done things that kept me going, even on my worst days. Everything from spending hours, days, weeks, months, years under the care of competent professionals who genuinely care about their patients, to getting a happy face emoji in a text at the right time… it has all contributed to my recovery and it is impossible for me to properly express how incredibly grateful I am.

The best I can do is say thank you, everyone. I hope you know who you are and how much your time and support mean to me. I don’t understand why some of you have stuck around, but you have given me something so valuable by being who you are and doing what you do.

Anyway… I hadn’t planned to write anything about a blogiversary. I stumbled across it by accident while looking for a particular image.

So, the big thing that’s going on in my head is that – for whatever reason – I can meditate again. Aside from chasing some ghosts, I can sit in a quiet room and not need to worry about what my brain is going to start doing. This is a very good thing, because while the mindfulness and meditation exercises aren’t as big a part of my day as they used to be, not being able to do them when I’m feeling a little rough makes things difficult.

Combine the above with no nightmares and I’m pretty happy with how things are going. Yes, I’ve been here before, and yes, it sucked that I had to work and wait to get back to this point, but recovery is not a straight line. Here’s a picture that I’ve posted a couple of times. It’s from one of my first appointments from Dr C, but it’s still just as relevant today:

Recovery GraphRecovery has its ups and downs; the goal is to have the underlying trend be positive.

I had an appointment with Dr C today. It went reasonably well. I asked her what she thought about those water detectors I’ve been thinking about and we spent quite a while thinking through that. As is often the case, I didn’t leave with a firm answer, but more of a guide to use when thinking about it. I think that one or maybe two standalone (not networked) detectors is a good idea. Having them scattered around the house and setting up a central point to monitor them all is not a good idea. They’re not essential and I shouldn’t treat them that way.

I think.

J surprised me by picking me up from my appointment, which was very nice of her. We went home, had a good chat, and had some supper before she went off to study and I went to go puttering around. We watched another iZombie this evening, it was pretty good.

FA is coming over tomorrow morning so we can work on her project. After the great progress we made last week, I am pretty confident that we will get it done or almost done tomorrow. She still has Friday available in the event that we don’t finish things up tomorrow. I am looking forward to hanging out with FA, talking, and working around problems that pop up. We make a pretty great team and between us I think we can figure almost anything out!

I also have a Dr H appointment tomorrow afternoon. With luck, it won’t cause too much disruption with the work FA and I are doing.

Assuming I don’t sleep through my alarm again, I plan to get up a little earlier than usual tomorrow. So, I’m heading to bed a little earlier, too. Tomorrow’s going to be a good day!

Stay safe.

Enormulous Progress!

Song: “Crazy Train” by Ozzy Osbourne

Mood: 7

Nightmares: 0

Ghosts: Several

***It seems I started this post last night but never finished or posted it. I’ll finish it up now***

I had another nightmare-free sleep last night. I woke up four(?) times; I remember worrying about the garage door and whether the front door was locked. I only remember having to get out of bed once for the garage door, though.

I slept through my alarm again this morning. It appears I didn’t even hit snooze, I just snored my way right through it. That’s both good and bad. Good, because I don’t often get as much sleep as I should be. Bad, because I had stuff to do and it’s a little alarming that I slept through two whole runs of a loud Undertones song playing 30cm from my head…

When I wake up in the morning it usually takes a while before I get to the point where I realize I’m awake and I’m coherent to do something about it. When I looked at the clock and saw the time, I tried to figure out what was going on. Once I realized that I’d slept in almost two hours, I got a helpful little jolt of adrenaline that got me up and on my feet.

I dashed/shuffled/wandered around the house, tidying things up and making myself pretty before FA showed up. She and I have been friends for 25 years (every time I think of that I can’t believe it’s been that long) and I’m pretty sure that she wouldn’t be put off by the odd dirty dish or old flyers on the couch, but I like to use anyone visiting as a reason to whip things into shape a bit.

FA got here around noon and we had lunch – she stopped at the burrito shop like usual but got me a burrito with a different filling (black beans and bacon) and it was amazing. Right up there with the refried bean filling. We talked about all kinds of stuff, including how good the burritos were today.

Once the burritos were gone, we started working on her project. Out came the paper and pencils, and the sketching, thinking, and idea-ing began. I think both of us were firing on all cylinders because in four hours we’d worked through or touched on pretty much every aspect of the design. By the time FA had to head out, things had gone from a kind of nebulous cluster of ideas to nicely defined plans. There’s still a lot of stuff to work out (such as the implementation of some of the aforementioned plans), but it’ll be a lot easier to make progress now that we have a good idea of what the end point will look like.

I had a really good time with FA today. My brain

[This is where I got to last night. Moving on…]

is pretty tired out but it’s that good kind of tired you get after having a good time with people you like. FA is sometimes hard to keep up with (particularly when having a debate with her) but she knows so much stuff and has so many ideas that aside from the friend aspect, it’s always interesting to talk with her. Plus, there is that nice happy feeling of accomplishment from figuring so many things out and having a solid way forward. It was a great visit and I consider myself very fortunate to have a friend like FA!

J got home just as FA was heading out. The three of us had a quick chat and then FA was on her way. J and I had a good chat about our days and got some supper put together. I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again – everything is better when she’s around!

After supper, J headed off to do some studying and I played some STO; we reconvened a while later and watched another episode of iZombie. Just when Liv and Major looked like they were figuring things out, they both ruined it again. Here’s how I hope the next episode plays out:

MAJOR: I know I had another girlfriend two days ago and I know she’s still texting me pictures of herself in frilly under-things, but you’re the one for me, babe. I promise.

LIV: I’m a zombie. You’re the show’s eye candy, and despite the fact we were engaged and I love you more than anything in the world, I would still be dating that dude with the cool accent if I hadn’t gotten him killed.

MAJOR: I know you’ve been going through my phone while I’m sleeping. That is still not cool, but as long as you don’t ask me about any of my other secrets, I think we can make this work.

LIV: You have other secrets? What kind of other secrets? How could you have more secrets? You’re supposed to tell me everything!

MAJOR: [sighs] Okay, fine. I think my girlfriend – you know, the one I was still dating two days ago and is still sending me pictures? That one. Anyway, I think she might be the same person as your new roommate. [laughs uncomfortably] Boy, Seattle sure is small, isn’t it?


MAJOR: Fine, but–

CAMERA pulls back just in time to realize that the two of them have been arguing in the middle of the I-5, cars swerving to avoid them by millimetres. Suddenly, both LIV and MAJOR to get run down by the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile. MAJOR is splattered all over the Wienermobile like ketchup. One of LIV’s ridiculous shoe heels punctures a fibreglass panel on the Wienermobile and she is stuck for 40km before falling loose far outside Seattle city limits. With no cellular reception, she is forced to walk back to town but gets there far too late to turn MAJOR into a zombie and save him. LIV eats MAJOR’s brain and has visions that make her finally realize that he is far, far less than a set of nice pecs. GILDA/RITA moves in with RAVI, PEYTON moves back in with LIV, and the next morning everyone is back to work for a normal day.

So that’s how I’m hoping it’s going to play out. We’ll see. Have a good weekend, everybody!

Stay safe.

Real Quick

Song: N/A

Mood: 6.5

Nightmares: 0

Ghosts: Lots

Real quick post tonight. Great time for bullet points!

  • No nightmares again!
  • It was another gorgeous day out. Lots more melting, and the little spruce tree in the front yard is peeking out of the snow now. I took another walk and spent some time outside.
  • Got some more stuff done around the house, did some laundry, etc.
  • More printing, more electronics, more writing, more thinking.
  • BP was 121/77 today, whoo!
  • All in all, a pretty good day!

FA is coming over tomorrow, I’m really looking forward to hanging out with her and chatting/brainstorming/gaming/whatever!

Stay safe.

Happy Spring 2019!

Song: “My Old Man’s A Dustman” by The Irish Rovers

Mood: 6.5

Nightmares: 0

Ghosts: Lots

Just a quick post tonight – it’s already pretty late.

No nightmares again last night, whoo! I woke up a few times but didn’t have to get out of bed for any of them so overall I think I slept pretty well. It didn’t take me forever to get going this morning, and once I was up and moving I was good for the rest of the day.

It was beautiful outside again today. Lots of melting snow out there, and the water along with blocked drains makes for some pretty big puddles. I went for a walk and took off my jacket halfway just so I could feel the sun on my skin. You know, vitamin D or whatever.

Dr H has asked me to take my blood pressure once in a while to make sure that it’s still under control. I haven’t remembered to do it for a few, uh… months, but I have an appointment with her next week so I figured I should probably get some numbers. I sat down at the machine, pressed the button, and waited for it to try and squeeze my arm off. I opened my eyes and looked at the display when I heard and felt the cuff hiss, and saw this:

BP reading

I am what the medical textbooks call a ‘prime physical specimen’.

I’m going to check it again tomorrow and see if it’s still good, but I’m sure it’s going to be fine… just fine.

Ghosts were a bit of a problem today but I think I was still quite productive. I’m still thinking about that water detector thing. Who wouldn’t want something that told them if there was water somewhere water shouldn’t be? I took a quick look at Amazon and there are over 9000 results for “water detector”, so somebody must be buying them. More thought required.

J and I watched another iZombie this evening. I’m less irritated and much more confused with Liv and Major’s relationship now. After the show was over, J and I spent the next hour talking about all kinds of stuff, from why we like some of our favourite books, to the history of gender reassignment surgery. We talk about all kinds of stuff.

With luck, I will have another nightmare-free sleep tonight and another productive day tomorrow. FA is still planning to come over on Friday and I’m really looking forward to that!

Oh, and it’s the first day of spring! Gross dirty slush days are ahead, and after that comes the green stuff!

Stay safe.

No Nightmares, Whoo!

Song: “I’m Running After You” by Major Hoople’s Boarding House

Mood: 6.5

Nightmares: 0

Ghosts: Lots

So I forgot to take my nighttime medication until around 11:30 last night. I figured that I’d be up for a couple of hours and then I’d head to bed when I started to feel them kicking in. No problem. It seems I crashed pretty quick. I don’t remember feeling tired. I don’t even remember when I woke up, but I was still sitting at the table, holding my head in my hands.

One of the weird things about the combination of medications I take at night (quetiapine, zopiclone, and prazosin) is that some nights I don’t notice it at all, while other nights it not only makes me tired, it also drains the strength right out of me. Some nights it’s so profound that I have to keep switching arms to brush my teeth because I can’t hold my toothbrush up. It’s usually not a problem because I should be asleep when it happens, but hoo boy I hope I don’t have to change a tire or move patio blocks in the middle of the night.

Regardless of how wet noodle-y my arms were last night, one great thing stands out – no nightmares! They seem to come in little clumps, but this last ‘clump’ was too long. Waking up from the same thing every night for the last two plus weeks was not fun in the least. Some of the other stuff is still bothering me (meditating and mindfulness exercises are out of the question for now), but it’s amazing how much better I feel in the morning when I haven’t woken up in the middle of the night, all freaked out and on the verge of panic. I’ve got my fingers and toes crossed that I don’t have another nightmare for a long time – that would be fantastic!

I remember waking up twice because I was worried about stuff, but both times I was able to look at my phone and go back to sleep pretty quickly. So despite falling asleep at the dining room table and stumbling into bed at whenever o’clock, I woke up feeling more with it than I have in quite a while. I didn’t go back to bed, I didn’t zone out on the couch, and I was fairly productive today.

Ghosts were more of a problem today than yesterday but I had an idea that might help a couple of things. One of the big things I worry about is water leaking from somewhere – the hot water heater is a big problem for me but I’m concerned about everything from the hose to the washing machine to the toilet tank overflowing. I think I’m going to make some little battery-powered water detectors that’ll beep or something. I could put one at the big drain in the basement which would cover the whole house, or I could put a couple of them at known trouble spots. That might help, and it would be another project for my brain to think about. My only worry is that… no, wait – I have two. My two worries are that having a little herd of these things around the house might be kind of silly, and that it may end up becoming yet another layer of things for me to obsess about. How will I know they’re working? How often should I change the batteries… that sort of thing.

A better way would be to poll the detectors at specific intervals, but that introduces some kind of wireless communication, which takes more power and is more expensive… and then would I worry that the central device that’s doing the polling is working properly? I could set up two of them and have them poll each other, but now this whole thing is starting to resemble stuff that I set up at work, and going back to those kind of lengths is probably not a smart thing for me to do. Maybe I’ll ask Dr C about it at my next appointment.

Anyway, I spent more time chasing ghosts today than yesterday but I still made progress on several things. Toothbrush holder revision – check. Quilting diamond design and test print – check. Looking into how to finish PETG – check. Converting data types and playing with variables in Python – check. Writing about some of the things that make water so special – check. Investigating the dishwasher leak issue – check. Ordering more filament – check. Tidying the kitchen – check!

I was pretty productive today. I even fit in some more STO and J and I watched another episode of iZombie. I’m looking forward to what will hopefully be a sleep that’s nightmare-free, and another day of making progress on several things.

I hope you all have a refreshing, nightmare-free sleep too!

Stay safe.


Song: “Banana Splits” by The Dickies

Mood: 6.5

Nightmares: 1

Ghosts: Pack

So… it’s 11:30PM and I just remembered to take my nighttime medication. Looks like I’ll be up for a while. Blargh.

Aside from a single nightmare last night (life jackets) and waking up three or four times worrying about the fridge being open and whether the garage door was closed, I didn’t sleep too badly. It took me a while to get going this morning but that’s pretty normal, unfortunately.

I worked on quite a few things today. I redesigned a bathroom accessory that J’s aunt asked if I could make for her and did a test print; it turned out much better than yesterday’s attempt. Still needs a bit of work but that’s okay. I also did some writing and worked on that project of FA’s.

I’m not sure what was different today but I didn’t have as many problems with ghosts as I do some days. I kept music playing but today I wore headphones instead of playing it over the speakers. The headphones have a switch that turns up the volume and puts in some white noise, so it covers up some sounds. I’ve wondered about getting a pair of fancy noise-cancelling headphones, but they’re pretty expensive and I don’t know if I want to drop that much money on something I can’t try first.

J got home early today so we could go to the medical lab and get some routine bloodwork done together. It was like a date, just with a few more people in white coats than the last time. We got there at the perfect time – the lab was almost empty – and we were in and out in about 15 minutes. While J was on her way home to pick me up, I went outside and puttered around in the garage for a bit. I need to put some paper or cardboard under the truck, though, because I’m worried that it may still be leaking coolant.

Speaking of the truck, I got a recall notice in the mail today. It had this picture in it:

Airbag Recall ImageSeems my friend has one of those airbags that will fire shrapnel into my face and potentially kill me should I get into an accident. Fortunately, I’m not doing a lot of driving nowadays, so it shouldn’t be a problem. I’ll give the dealership a call and see how much of a backlog they’ve got.

This evening was pretty quiet. J worked on her class assignments and I played some STO. We watched an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine this evening, it was pretty good. Oh, and I did some troubleshooting on that dishwasher leak and I think I know where it’s coming from. I will see if I can replicate my findings tomorrow and if it’s what I think it is, it should be pretty easy to fix.

Tomorrow will hopefully be similar to today. I don’t have any appointments scheduled, so I’d like to make some more progress on things. You know that feeling you get when it’s near the end of the day and you can look back and you’re satisfied with what you’ve accomplished? That’s what I’m hoping to feel tomorrow. Wish me luck.

Now, I’ve just got to keep myself occupied until everything kicks in and I’m ready to go to sleep…

Stay safe.

Quick Post, Quick Weekend

Song: N/A

Mood: 6.5

Nightmares: 2

Ghosts: Several

***My hosting provider did a hardware upgrade this weekend. Everything looks good except the post I did yesterday is missing. Here it is again***

FA came over this past Friday afternoon and we had burritos and worked on her project again. I had a good time and enjoyed puttering around with things and chatting with her. I think I said this in an earlier post, but I think we work well together.

This weekend went by very quickly. I kept busy for quite a lot of it and had some good results in several areas. Some, however, weren’t quite as good:

Failed 3D print

Hey, they can’t all be perfect…

With J home, it’s so much easier for me to concentrate on things – I can actually get in the groove and work on something for more than 15 minutes at a time. I should mention that that is only one of around two billion reasons it’s nice when she’s home.

At my appointment with Dr C last week, she mentioned a show she’d seen that she thought I might be interested in – a documentary called Behind The Curve. J and I watched it and it was both fascinating and kind of frustrating. I met a flat-earther once while I was in the hospital and we had a very interesting chat that was very similar to some of the things we saw in the documentary.

No appointments this week so I hope to get a lot of things accomplished. House stuff, printing stuff, sewing stuff, project stuff… all kinds of things. FA may be coming over again on Friday, too!

Stay safe.

More Zip Today

Song: “Mother’s Little Helper” by The Rolling Stones

Mood: 6

Nightmares: 1

Ghosts: Lots

For whatever reason, I was very anxious last night when I started getting ready for bed, and it escalated to a panic attack shortly after I got into bed. I did my best to stay still but it felt like I was drowning and I needed to flail around so I went out into the light of the living room, put on some music, and did my best to stay quiet. Fortunately, it only took around 30 minutes before I had calmed down enough to go back.

Aside from one nightmare (life jackets) and worrying about the garage door being closed twice, I think I slept reasonably well. When I got up this morning I was worried that it was going to be another day like yesterday but by the time I was finished my breakfast I was feeling my usual 35% or so.

I spent a lot of time working on things today. J asked if I could make her another organizer part for her stuff in the bathroom so I did some measuring and started the print. I plan to put in the black PETG tomorrow and start in on some of the other things that are on my list. I also tidied up the kitchen some more (it never ends!) and tried to trace my steps back to where I was with the Raspberry Pi before it died the other day. I’ve got some more stuff figured out, so that’s good.

My mom called today and we had a long chat. She’s worried about her siblings – they all have health issues, none of which are minor. One of my uncles has finally got an infection under control so he’s now working with a prosthetic leg, another is suffering from the inexorable (and utterly unfair) progression of ALS, and all of them have diabetes, the severity of which spans from “quite” to “extremely”. She’s worried about Dad, she’s worried about me… I wish I knew what to say that would make her feel better. Mom and Dad are thinking of taking a trip to visit her family, and I really think they should do it – the sooner, the better.

The pharmacy that J and I moved our prescriptions to called today and apologized for not having everything ready for this afternoon. The poor guy was promising up and down it would all be ready tomorrow afternoon, and I kept telling him that it was fine – I had a few more days left so Friday was great. It is such a pleasant experience dealing with them than with our old pharmacy, who wouldn’t have bothered to call and let us know that things were delayed by a day, or even if they had or hadn’t followed up to renew prescriptions. I wish we’d moved over a long time ago!

I think FA is coming over tomorrow, which will be great. I have some stuff that I’m looking forward to showing her, and I expect we will make a lot of progress with her project. A refresher on some of the stuff she explained to me last week would be helpful, too. I’ve been really enjoying working on this project, it’s been very interesting and I think “exciting” would be another word I’d use. Even if it doesn’t work out, it’s been fun and brainstorming on projects with FA is always fun!

J and I watched another iZombie. I have decided that Major now belongs in the same category as Tom from The Blacklist – so annoying that I wish I could reach through the TV and punch him in the face. Ah, well… every show has to have one or two people you don’t like. Makes for variety.

Stay safe.

Feeling Pretty Run Down

Song: “Keep A Knockin’” by Little Richard

Mood: 6

Nightmares: 1

Ghosts: Pack

I don’t think I slept all that bad last night, but when I woke up this morning I felt beat. I had breakfast and tried to shake off the grogginess and fog but I couldn’t do it. I set another alarm and went back to bed. I fell back asleep and remember waking up once because I was worried that the front door was open (which is weird because I usually worry that it’s unlocked, not wide open), but I got up, took a look, and then went back to bed and fell asleep AGAIN. I got up shortly after the alarm went off, got all prettied up, called a cab, and headed out to my appointment with Dr C.

I’m not sure what’s going on or whatever, but it’s really strange that I went back to sleep like that. Maybe I didn’t sleep well after all, maybe I’m fighting a bug, maybe my hard-partying ways finally caught up with me – I don’t know. Hopefully tomorrow I will be back to normal because I really don’t like feeling like that.

My Dr C appointment went alright. She has moved into her new office on another, newly renovated floor, and everything’s shiny and new. One of her first questions was what I thought of the renovations, and I surprised myself with some of the stuff I said. Bottom line is it’s nice and new, doesn’t stink of new construction or VOCs, but it’s very sterile looking and the windows don’t have bug screens. We spent some time working on the things I need to work on – namely, the things I need to be doing or keep doing at home.

After I got home I felt pretty pooped again so I sat down on the couch and didn’t move until after J got home. Fortunately, the radio was playing some pretty good stuff today.

We sat down to watch another iZombie this evening, and it wasn’t too bad. Not as good as some of the other episodes but it was alright. I also rebuilt the Raspberry Pi on another card and it seems to be behaving itself. I tried to check the old one out on my computer but it looks like it is indeed fried.

No appointments tomorrow. I’m assuming that this morning was a blip and tomorrow I’ll be up and puttering around like usual. I have a few things that I want to work on or get done.

Stay safe.

Could It Be?

Song: N/A

Mood: 6

Nightmares: 1

Ghosts: Horde

Just a quick post today – I got distracted by some stuff and it’s pretty late.

I think I slept a little better last night. One nightmare (tent) that I remember, and I only foggily remember worrying about the front door twice. I didn’t need to get out of bed for any of them, which is great.

I got a few things done today. I cleaned up the tub parts (PETG always seems a little ‘hairy’). The re-print that I started last night finished, but when I went to check it, it didn’t come out quite right, either. My mother-in-law stopped by on her way home today to pick up the parts and she seemed to be okay with using it – I plan to print it again and she’ll be back in town in a month or so. I think when I put the glue on the bed I missed a few spots so the layers bubbled up, leaving what looks like dents in an otherwise flat surface. They were too deep to sand out, and dammit – I stand by my work.

I did some more sewing today, too. That reminds me, I need to add sewing and a few other things to my stress box.

I made some more progress on the thing FA and I are playing around with. Things were going pretty well until the uSD card in the Raspberry Pi up and died. That’ll teach me for using a no-name card that’s been used and abused for years in a new setup. Shouldn’t take too long to get back to where I was, though.

Our Dirt Devil upright vacuum has around three nautical miles of cord and we’ve just been velcroing it into a bundle when it’s not being used. My plan today was to design two clips that we could wrap the cord around, which would make using and putting away the vacuum easier. Unfortunately, only when I was far too close to being done did I discover that I had used the wrong measurement in the very first step, and resizing it was out of the question. So… that was a bit of a wash. But I’m getting better with Fusion 360, so there’s that…

I had quite a bit of trouble with ghosts today. It’s embarrassing to be inside your home and nervous about things like the odd creak or ticking sound. They’re all normal – I just wish that I could believe that at the time. The siding in particular was quite active today, I could hear it crawling around on the house. On the upside, the reason it was crawling around on the house was because of this:

+1C today!That’s right – it may have actually been above freezing today! Could it be that spring is almost here?

Played some more Star Trek Online this evening. My current favourite character is a Romulan that I set up a while ago (Doctor Teeth), and the ship (the Electric Mayhem) is pretty swell except it’s so flimsy that if it’s Taco Tuesday on board and one of my crew overdoes it and farts, it blows out a bulkhead and the ship explodes. Anyway, I decided to build a ship that’s possibly the most useless in the game and have fun with it. I took out all the fancy beam weapons and loaded it up with torpedoes. I got a new torpedo the other day and it fires this giant angry red blob that explodes like crazy when (if) it hits a target. Some people don’t like being on a team with me because my ship shoots things that potential targets can outrun, but it’s pretty amusing when I get my timing right and land a long line of different torpedoes on a target.

J and I watched another iZombie. I’ve got to say that both Liv and Major are pretty terrible people, and I can say this because I’ve been married for… uh… a non-trivial number of years. The two of them either need to talk to each other or stop talking to each other – there are so many mixed signals going on between them that they’re going to need a referee or their own telephone exchange. You’re a zombie hunter, your ex-fiancee is a zombie. Either dispatch her with all haste or don’t – just stop laying on your bed while listening to sad music. But I quite enjoy the show.

Okay, now I’m up way later than I’d planned to be so I need to end this here. Have a good night.

Stay safe.