Song: “Ocean Man” by Ween
Mood: 6
Nightmares: 2?
I slept a little better last night despite a couple of nightmares, one of which sent me to the couch in the living room for about 45 minutes. I really wish I could sleep in. Even on the days when J is so quiet and stealthy that I’m not aware of her getting up and heading to work, I still wake up around 7:45-8AM and can’t get back to sleep. It would be really nice if, when I had a particularly rough night, I could sleep in or be able to take a nap. Except in very rare cases, neither sleeping in nor napping is possible.
It was cool but very nice out this morning. I walked around the block twice (although once I took a shortcut through the park). Things are still damp from the storms we got the other night and the air smelled pleasant, although one car I walked by smelled very strongly of perfume. Bleccch.
My exercises went a little better today. When I was talking to Dr C about them on Thursday, I mentioned that if I didn’t do them or if they didn’t go well, I didn’t feel right for the rest of the day. Dr C then asked me a question that concerned me a bit – is me spending time in the mornings doing mindfulness and worrying a good part of my day, or is it another unhealthy thing that I feel I must do or bad things will happen? I wasn’t sure how to answer, and it’s got me thinking. I hope it’s not another symptom/expression of my OCD or anxiety – I’ve spent a lot of time and effort getting it to where it works pretty often and it’s so much more than just sitting in a chair for 15 minutes. I’ll have to think about that some more.
I worked and thought a lot about DA’s cabin stuff. It seems like each day I have another idea for something to try. I haven’t felt this creative in quite a while. Am I actually going to successfully build anything? Who knows, but darn it if I’m not having ideas coming out my ears.
My mom called today and we had a good chat. She was curious about how my appointments went this week and told me about her next set of renovation plans. Lots of stuff going on!
Speaking of renovations, when I was on my way to my appointment on Thursday, we passed by a house where the front yard was done in a very interesting way. We have two flower beds out front, but only one of them can grow anything – the other one gets too much sun and reflection off the siding and windows and anything we plant pretty much burns to a crisp. I’ve always felt that a house should be close to symmetrical, but the house I saw only had one flower bed, whilst the area between the front step and driveway was decorative stone with step blocks down it for a path to the front step. On the side with the stones, plants were growing from raised planters up against the house. I thought it looked pretty nice, and it shouldn’t be too hard to do…
J and I hung out this evening and watched some more Parks and Recreation. So far, season 3 is going well. I’m not sure what happened to one of the characters (they’re gone and aren’t even mentioned) but the show has the same feel to it. I like that.
I hope you all have a good weekend – find something fun to do!
Stay safe.