Almost The Weekend

Song: N/A

Mood: 5

Nightmares: 0

When I woke up I could tell from the light filtering through the curtain that there was snow on the ground. Turns out that our first “real” snow arrived during the night. It kept snowing on and off this morning and it was very windy out. Fortunately, the snow was melting on the roads so they were just wet, not slippery.

I spent most of my day on the couch again. I’m getting really tired of this.

My appointment with Dr P went well. We’ve moved away from the ACT for a bit to address the depression and anxiety I’ve been feeling for the last few weeks. One of the big things we’re working on is getting me out of the house. Dr C and I had worked on this for a while and her recommendation to me was to get outside and away from the house once a day. I was doing that for a while but slipped back a while ago and now, aside from appointments, I get out of the house between zero and one times per week.

It is difficult for me to be away from the house. I worry constantly that I’ve left the door unlocked or the stove is on or the garage door is open or any of a dozen other things. The farther I get from home, the more difficult it is.

To work on this, Dr P suggested that I do some exposure therapy. I’m going to go to Walmart three times next week and walk around until I feel that my anxiety has peaked and then decreased. I don’t need to buy anything, I just need to walk around. Fortunately, Walmart is large enough that I can walk around in it for a while without looking creepy.

This plan with the exposure therapy will help me in two ways: it will hopefully make me more comfortable with being out of the house, and it will get me moving around a bit. Since I’ve been stuck in this rut, I’ve barely moved around and haven’t done my exercises at all.

I hope I can scrape together enough motivation to drag myself off the couch and do it. Wish me luck.

Stay safe.

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