Song: “My Old Yellow Car” by Dan Seals (good luck Larry & Sandy)
Mood: 6
Nightmares: 0
I got to sleep late last night, woke up a bunch of times (no nightmares, thankfully), and then woke up too early this morning and couldn’t get back to sleep. I tried convincing myself to stop just laying there and staring at the wall and do ANYTHING else but I couldn’t. I tried turning music on my phone but that didn’t help, either. I tried motivationally coaching myself but couldn’t be bothered. Finally, I just gave up and stared at the wall.
Eventually, bladder discomfort won out over apathy and I slowly hauled myself into a sitting position on the edge of the bed, mumbled some useless words, and then stood up.
That was how my day started, and things didn’t change all that much as time went on. It was raining most of the day again, so I didn’t get out for my walk. I was really hoping that this week I would be walking into a store but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen.
My exercises didn’t go very well, even with the routine I’ve been having success with lately. I couldn’t focus and ended up wandering around the house, heading toward whatever target was bothering me the most at the moment.
I texted with a lot of people again. It feels good to keep in touch with people but sometimes when everybody replies at the same time and my phone whistles for 15 seconds straight it freaks me out a bit. Who do I answer first? Does somebody need something and asked but I missed it? Am I annoying people with all of my texts? Did I send a text to the wrong person? Did I miss sending a text to someone?
With great texting power comes great texting responsibility, I guess.
I spoke to my mom and sister this afternoon. It was a short chat (they were on their way out to go shopping) but it was good to talk to them. Mom has settled in very well and is getting along with the cats. She chases them around a bit but they seem to like the attention.
It is my brother-in-law’s birthday today, and he and I talked this evening. He’s a good guy and when we get a chance to hang out we have a lot of fun. Unfortunately, I don’t see (or even talk to) him very often at all. It was great talking to him, though, and we both committed to making the effort to talk more often. Fingers crossed.
Other than that, I had all kinds of plans for what I was going to do today but I couldn’t get any momentum going. No microscope, no Fortnite (well, two rounds actually but I didn’t do any reading and got immediately mangled again), no chesterfield repair attempts, no walk, no bass… just a lot of music and YouTube videos. For me, music is good all the time, but YouTube is something I shouldn’t be spending more than, say, an hour on a day. I wasted far too much time today, and I’m vacillating between not caring and feeling guilty about it.
I think not getting nearly enough sleep last night had a big impact on my day. Even on “good” nights, I’m still not getting as much sleep as I should. Hopefully I’ll sleep better tonight.
Stay safe.